Wednesday, October 29, 2003

what? what? what?

Just got done spending almost two hours checking out 115 tables worth of college/university reps extolling the virtues of their respective graduate school programs.

After all those questions descriptions conversations brochures pamphlets smiles quizzical glances handshakes endless filling-out of information cards, I have only two things to say:

- If I thought I was even anywhere remotely close to figuring things out, I was pretty damn wrong.
- And, you know what, forget next June; that fifth year is sounding pretty appealing all over again.

Graaaaaand, as Seher would say. Add in some intonations/inflections of sarcasm frustration dejection confusion annoyance bitterness tension chaos (did I mention confusion?), and there you have it, Yasminay the perpetually confoozid child. Great. So, Seher-woman, don't worry, you're not the only confused one out there.

Life is such a process sometimes. Geez.

[Update: This evening, I went to a lecture that opened my eyes and made me think. I went out to dinner with an crazy group of friends who made me laugh 'til my stomach hurt - and you know that's the best type of laughter. The crescent moon out there is looking absolutely beautiful - go see. I feel better now, because insha'Allah I can handle this, too, just like everything else. And if I still decide to go ahead with a fifth year, big deal. Random ladies will still think I'm in high school, and the high school kid who bags my groceries every week will still persist in calling me "Ma'am." And one of these years, I'll figure out what I'm trying to do with my life. Meanwhile, blue raspberry slurpees are the key to happiness. Go buy yourself one, too. You know you wanna.]

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